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in the old testament, God was all like, "hey Abraham, kill your son", and at the last second, Isaac said, "this is cancel culture imo", and God changed his mind because of that

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the tall lady from resident evil wouldn't fuck you

I need new content for when I compulsively check my social media every five mins. Ugh.

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How am I supposed to switch to Mastodon when the feed is so slow moving

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Yesterday was really rough so today I did a lot of self care. Psych therapy, extra sleep, got my hair done, cryotherapy and red light therapy, and got groceries.

I'm feeling much better.

I read somewhere that self care is parenting yourself and that's always been a helpful paradigm for me.

Today's gender:

A chandelier in pieces

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plato's cave got that good surround sound for when they're watching cars the movie

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if you're on fedi and think you aren't queer in some way, oh do I have news for you

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Budweiser super bowl commercials over the ages:

1991: dude your gonna get so much pussy at a pool party if you bring buds

2001: wasssssuuuuuuupppp

2021: in these trying times we look to the words of Malcom X...

Phantom of the Opera is stunning on shrooms. Emmy Rossum is divine.

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Queer looking for a home, boosts appreciated 

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Oh wait no. It was when I started doing erp on servers where asterisk would change the text.

The answer was "because horny" again, ig. 🤣

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Remembering how I used to adamantly refuse to write actions like *sips tea* and would only write them like <sips tea> which I actually still find more visually pleasing. When did I switch over?

Maybe it was when I shocked my brain.

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the captain: arrr, we're pirates!

me: yeah I noticed your pride flag 🏴☠️🏴‍☠️

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hot take: touch screens are simply not a good computer human interaction device

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BeingPresent.Me

This is a social network (a Mastodon instance) centered around mental health.